Make Room for the Gray

Many days ago (it was a different age) the world was a different place.  Relationships were the utmost.  Dialogue existed beyond debate.  Conversations could be civil and connected.  This is not to say that there weren't uproarious disagreements and visceral arguments, it's just that something is missing now.

Each step we take deeper into the future, it seems the gray is being increasingly erased.  We're retreating further into our increasingly reinforced satellites, lighthouses, and castles.  A world that was made for connectivity is reaching for ways to power itself.  Though we thrive on the energy, critiques, and validation of our neighbors, we're finding more ways everyday to become self-sustaining.

I don't think we're built to be self-propelled guard towers in a vast field far from each other.  I don't think happiness and joy are the same thing.  I think we're confusing one for the other.  We've somehow convinced ourselves that we're the beginning, the middle, and the end, though truthfully we cannot abandon the present moment, if only for an instant.  It is for this reason that many of us seek external remedies (or anesthesias) to distract us from the now.

I am not immune.  I do not claim to sit atop an elevated statue and deliver the glories of war to the ones that tilled the fields during those uncertain years.  I am just like the rest of you, and no, we are not the same.  The circles under my eyes are not scars of which to boast; I know they overlap your own.  I need criticism and I need validation just as I claim that you do.  I need you just as I believe that you need me.

We cannot continue to erase the gray.  Some may be confused and think that the gray is a mundane fog that is meant to blind us.  I am not talking of that depressing vapor that lay inside us and somehow seems to separate us from each other.  No, this gray is our overlapping humanity.  It is the conversations without fear of disagreement.  It's listening intently to understand the humanity of the one in front of and behind you instead of hearing talking points until you turn your ears off as you form your own argument.  Do you hear that?  The sound of your sister crying out to not just be heard, but listen to?

I'm just saying, we cannot abandon the value of the relationship yet.  It has too much to offer us and alternative seems only to be leading us down a long, wide, and uneven path toward destruction.  It may be true that the road to hell is paved with good intentions, so we must learn to embrace conflict when we know it is for growth.  Not just our growth, but their (the other's) growth.  I choose a storied path with bumps, bruises, and unknown endings over the smooth and comfortable road free from conflict leading to most certain death, destruction, and never-ending isolation.