Dear Expectations,
You're ruining my reality. You're prolonged exposure. You're overthinking. All that you look for and all your extensive "research" and planning expose me to seemingly endless options. I've got a good thing going and you rob me of my joy by reminding me there's more. Endless options cripple my commitment and fuel my desire. When we're absent something seems to eat at me and I don't like it. It seems real, it seems sincere, but so does the rest.
I value the time we share but have I lifted it too high? Do I just need some rest? Who will win the race between my competing thoughts? When we spend so much time hoping, longing, and expecting, are we bound to experience unfulfillment? I guess there is truly just One that will satisfy.
I mustn't think too much, though I mustn't run from thinking. Don't dwell on fodder for the fire, but don't forget to admire the lilies in the field either. Life is a balance, though don't make it lukewarm. Do we seek the middle ground or do we look beyond ourselves?
Expectations, you're destroying me from the inside out. Expectations, you're corroding my heart and soul. My mind says you're the rational way to go, but my heart says love (and life) is irrational.
Pay no attention to my lack of attention. Don't dwell on the absurd. It's a dangerous drum circle, enticing you with a steady rhythm. The smoke within shouts your name, trying to convince you that it knows you. After all, it knows your name, is that not a leap in the right, connected direction? Don't believe it though. How many are there with whom you've shared your name? Even automatic emails know that. Don't creep closer. Don't fall in. The rhythm that you're making and the beat that you're following will lead you in the right direction. Keep walking, unless you're looking to give up your mind.
Let your heart and head work together and follow the necessary Path. All else will lead to destruction, unfulfilled dreams, a lack of interest, and a poor vicarious life.
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