My Vicarious Life

Some feelings lately:

"There's a voice in my head but it's not me."

"I think way too much on a one track mind."

"I don't know what else to do...Are You sure You want me?"

"You said, 'I know that this will hurt, but if I don't break your heart then things will just get worse. If the burden seems too much to bear, remember the end will justify the pain it took to get us there.'...And You promise me that You believe in time I will defeat this 'cause somewhere in me there is strength...Reach out to me. Make my heart brand new."

"...I was positive that unless I got myself together I would watch me fall apart and I can't let that happen again...See that line? I never should have crossed it...It's the very moment that I wish that I could take back. And who I am will take the second chance You gave me."

"I've thrown away so many things that could've been much more. I've thrown away the secret to find an end to this. And I just pray that my problems go away if they're ignored, but that's not the way it works...Any control I thought I had, just slips right through my hands, while my ever present conscience shakes its head and reprimands me. Then and there, I confess I'll blame all this on my selfishness. Yet You love me and that consumes me. And I'll stand up again, and do so willingly. You give me hope and hope it gives me life. You touch my heavy heart and when You do You make it light."

"And I've been locked inside that house all the while You hold the key."

"You're the only One who understands completely. You're the only One who knows me yet still loves completely....and through the times I've faded and You've outlined me again."

"...I know that I don't want to die sitting around watching my life go by. And what we take from this is what we'll get. And we haven't quite figured it out just yet because all of us are all too stuck. Strapped to a chair watching our lives blow up."

"I just fall apart 'cause that's my trademark. It's my trademark move to turn my back on You. It's my trademark move to realize I should improve. And sometime soon after that You'll see me come crawling back."

"Everybody makes mistakes, here's your lifeline"

"...even if your hope has burned with time. Anything that's dead shall be re-grown."

"Something's broken and seems unnatural."

"I'm not the one to admit it's helpless. I have a sense that we will be alright."

"...Keep me responsible be it a light or heavy load. I walk with grace my feet and faith my eyes."

"You make everything glorious and I am Yours. What does that make me?"

"Ever faithful, ever true. You, I know, You never let go. You never let go. You never let go. You never let go. You never let go. You never let go."